T-minus four weeks

Holy crap: Exactly four weeks from today, I will be a married man. I couldn’t be happier about this, and I couldn’t feel luckier, but it still seems a little surreal. It seems like my beautiful and amazing fiancée turned to me 20 minutes ago and said, “It’s exactly six months until our wedding day.” Five months blew by, and as I type this, we’re at 28 days and two hours, and counting.

Game over, or just starting?

I’m 100% calm, focused, and at peace with our decision. I have zero doubt that I’m doing the right thing, and I’m not the least bit nervous. The only slight worry in the back of my mind is hoping that the weather cooperates and enables us to be married outside, and hoping that everything goes smoothly and as planned. I still can’t believe it’s only four weeks away, though.

So far, everything has been great. My fiancée has been responsible for 99.9% of the planning, and she’s done a fantastic job. All of the plans are coming together nicely, and everything is moving forward at a good pace. This will hopefully continue.

And merging families has never even been close to an issue. My fiancée’s family has been nothing but fantastic to me since we started dating, and we truly get along well. It’s not a case of, “Well, they’re her family, and I’m stuck with them, so I might as well deal with it.” They’re great people, and I have felt welcome from minute one.

But what is it about the words “married” and “husband” that gives them such a powerful effect? As I said, I’m 100% on board with everything and couldn’t be happier, yet those words still make me hesitate for a second, channel Keanu Reeves from Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure and say, “Whoa!”

I’m looking forward to all of it: The bachelor party (I don’t even want to know what kinds of shenanigans are being planned), the rehearsal dinner, the ceremony, the cocktail hour (cocktails are never a bad idea), the reception and getting on the plane to go to a place I’ve wanted to go since I was nine years old: Hawaii.

As I said, I’m calm, I’m not the least bit nervous, and there isn’t the slightest hint of hesitation on my part. So why are those two words so rattling?

The human brain is a strange, strange thing.

The best part about 2009 (well … besides getting engaged)? It wasn’t 2008!

Everyone else is doing year-end blog posts, so what the hell? And what better way to do so than actually waiting until the last day of the year, sitting in the recliner, on the laptop, sipping an Exit 1 Bayshore Oyster Stout (yes, it’s exactly what it sounds like, stout brewed with oysters) from Flying Fish Brewing, with a cat assisting me by resting on the back of the recliner (Hi, Trouble!)?

So, here goes nothing. I didn’t think 2009 was an overly good year or an overly bad year. It was pretty mixed for me, with more good than bad, but not enough good to call it wonderful. This is in direct contrast to 2008, which can pretty much go to hell. I managed to lose my job, my favorite bar and my ballpark in 2008, while 2009 brought some sadness, but nowhere near on the level of 2008.

In Newport, R.I., just before getting engaged

The highlight of 2009, by far, was getting engaged. It was a remarkable day, spent in Newport, R.I., and a remarkable experience that I will never forget. I have yet to experience one second of doubt about this and likely never will.

The precursor to getting engaged was fun, as well: Welcoming my fiancée and her cat, Skittles, to the apartment my two cats, Trouble and 8-Ball, graciously allow me to occupy. Trouble and 8-Ball still hate Skittles, but their skirmishes have become more amusing than alarming. As for the humans, we’re getting along just fine, thank you!

Anyone who knows me and has gotten to this point is saying, “Um, what about the World Series, jackass?” About fucking time! The entire season for the Yankees was a great run, starting way back when I first saw the new Yankee Stadium, before the start of the regular season. Yes, I would move back across the street in a heartbeat, and I miss the old ballpark like a lost family member. But it was great to have the Yankees rise back to the top again, and I really liked the makeup of this team, as opposed to some of the underachieving squads of the mid-2000s.

Skittles

I went to two weddings that I was very happy about, within weeks of each other. Both brides are longtime friends of mine, one much longer than the other, and both finally found perfect matches and soul mates, which was quite heart-warming. It’s funny to think of how much I used to hate weddings, and how quickly my opinion of them reversed when the prospect of actually being a groom inched closer to reality.

My then-girlfriend, now-fiancée and I went on a great trip to Cancun and, even though it was more than nine months ago, I still find myself dealing with insatiable cravings for Mojitos at 11 a.m. on occasion. We also went to Cape May and loved it and, of course, there was Newport, where I finally popped the question (without actually popping the question, as I am constantly reminded of … sigh!).

Now, on to the not-so-good: The obvious lowlight is pretty simple. If anyone had told me that I would go an entire calendar year and not spend one second working on a full-time job, I’d have asked them when I won the lottery or was named in the will of a rich old aunt I had never met. This economy sucks, this recession sucks, and this job market sucks. I’d have completely lost what little mind I have left if it wasn’t for the one part-time job I still have.

Bidie, R.I.P.

One of my favorite pooches went on to doggy heaven. I still miss Bidie. I lived with the little bug-eyed, hot-tempered, 200-decibel-snoring rascal of a Boston Terrier for a year, but I knew her for most of her long, happy life, and there was a strong bond between us. As I said in my tribute post to her: If there’s a dog run in Heaven, I hope all of the other dogs up there are quick, or they might be in for a rude awakening.

For the first time since 2001, I was not part of a beach house on LBI, mostly for financial reasons. It turned out to be a good summer to skip, as it seemed like it rained almost every weekend, but there’s a certain calm and peacefulness about being near water, and I truly missed that all summer.

My Aunt Rose gave me a huge scare, as she suffered a minor heart attack and minor stroke in October. It was very unsettling for a while, as she was having a great deal of trouble expressing things like names, numbers and dates, but she’s improved to the point where she’s very, very close to 100%. I knew things were on the upside when she started nagging again.

So as I said earlier, overall, 2009 was pretty mixed, and it doesn’t draw the same “two middle fingers up” response that 2008 would. There was a lot of good and lot of bad, but the good outweighed the bad. Whatever else happens in 2010 (a job would be nice), our wedding April 25 and the honeymoon in Hawaii directly afterward will be the highlights, and I’m ecstatic about both.

The Flying Fish Exit 1 Bayshore Oyster Stout is now history, and I am currently enjoying a Defiant Christmas Ale as I post this. Happy New Year to all who read this, and I hope 2010 is better for everyone. Cheers!

My fiancée and I on the beach at Key West