How to get caught cheating on your wife

A story I read in today’s edition of the New York Post was basically a step-by-step primer on a great way to get caught cheating on your wife, so I thought I’d share it with everyone. Information, after all, is a valuable tool.

First off, you don’t want to pick just any woman to cheat with. Why would you want to go and do something silly like that? No, you want to pick a woman who’s instantly recognizable to reporters, photographers and just about anyone who’s been near a television or newspaper since former New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer added the “former” to his description. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you: Ashley Dupre. Her “friends” call her Kristen. And she addresses her friends by client number. Sadly, 9 is already taken.

Second, you don’t pick just any old place to hook up. If you’re going to go for it, you might as well go for the gusto. So be sure to pick a well-known Manhattan hotel where Lindsay Lohan and her lesbian lover, Samantha Ronson, are staying. There will be plenty of press and paparazzi there.

Finally, be sure your wife doesn’t find out from the nosy neighborhood yenta. Get with the program. This is the information age. A story in the New York Post that will spread via e-mail faster than the old Nigerian bank scam is the way to go.

So what was T.J. Earle thinking? I mean, seriously? Was he trying to get caught? The guy is the vice president of a major construction company, and he’s putting himself in a position to lose half of his shit? I don’t want to lose half of my shit, and I’m sure half of my shit is about half of a percent of half of his shit.

Stupidity is alive and well.

4 comments on “How to get caught cheating on your wife

  1. Meg says:

    I know the Earle family. This will devastate TJ’s mom. She has always been very aware of how people perceive the family because of The EARLE corp. I read today that he told his wife he was set up. She actually believes it. I guess love and money (lots of it) conquer all.

  2. SIGuido says:

    When I first read this story I said to myself TJ Earle is the one who set Ashley up and we all found out that is the case. TJ Earle tried to blame Ashley for everything. You don’t go bragging to your friends. He knew what his intentions were and he went for it. I do not blame Ashley. The only people I feel sorry for are his family. I don’t have one ounce of sympathy for this man because this is not the first time and it won’t be the last. Why is this married man with a beautiful wife and two children bar hopping. I wonder what he told his wife for the past month that this affair was going on. The lies finally caught up to him.

  3. NJnews says:

    they spotted ashley in Atlantic City the week before the NYC incident and the quick report said she was with a male companion. i wander if it was TJ, it says they had a month long affair. i know the family are big donators and supporters of the local catholic church, just must be a big blow to his entire family. I do really hate all the bad press Ashley is getting over this, like she held a gun to this guys head and led him to cheating…may his empire fall for what hes done to his entire family…

  4. […] There are few people who love baseball more than I do, but $2,500 to see one regular-season baseball game is a sick joke, no matter where the tickets are. Most Yankees games drag on for about four hours, and ex-New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer paid less than $2,500 for four hours with Ashley Dupre. […]

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